Mental rambles

About a month ago I was walking home from work when I heard some men shouting at each other down one of the side roads. There was a group of white skinheads in a car and a group of youngish black men on the pavement besides them.
They were arguing over who had the right to be in the road. Apparently the ‘Black gang’ had been walking in the road and the ‘White gang’ took offence to it and drove at them.
After a lot of mouthing off, one of the white boys got out of the car and confronted the black speaker. They had their faces inches apart.
Then he threw a punch. Despite the argument, it seemed to come out of nowhere. A punch like that would have knocked a few more of my teeth out and the victim of the punch went down.
Suddenly all the white boys poured out of their car and everyone on both sides started fighting.
I don’t know why I stopped. Paralysed by disbelief?
My initial reaction was to step in, but as both sides seemed as eager to fight as each other, it all seemed futile.
To be honest, I’d rather them hurt and damage each other than anyone else.

My baby boy somehow turned five recently and as a treat I took most of the family to Legoland near Windsor.
We went on a rainy Monday. My wife was concerned but I was pleased about it.
It continued to drizzle as we made our way slowly around the M25 and we arrived just after 11am.
The car park was empty! There must have been less than twenty cars.
We put our coats on and wandered up to the ticket booth.
£100 later we eating hot dogs and making our way to the Dragon ride.
No queues and even better; when we finished the ride the attendant offered us another go.
Fantastic!
The theme park was so empty that as well as the no queuing thing, we got three rides in a row of everything.
The children were tall enough to go on every ride they wanted and were thoroughly exhausted but happy by the time we were ready to leave.

One of my wife’s friends has a real low opinion of herself. She asked me what I thought the most attractive thing about a woman is.
A dangerous question I know.
I thought about it for a bit but then came up with an answer. It’s not big boobs or bouncy hair. It’s much more simple…
Joy is what makes a person attractive. Happiness in themselves and the ability to show kindness to others.

As my wife annually points out, I’m not great at birthdays. Mine or other people’s.
It’s not that I think they’re unimportant, but I just never seem prepared for them.
This year I got some small presents for the children to give and two tickets to see ‘Il Divo’ from me.
They make me smile for all the wrong reasons, but my wife really likes them. (Especially the Swiss one.)
Unfortunately, due to U2 giving an impromptu concert from the BBC building near Regents Park, I was late and worse; we couldn’t drive the way we wanted to.
Unsurprisingly we were late for the show and missed most of the first half.
I was so pleased to get there though, I didn’t even mind the £20 parking charge!
The four Mockra singers were very cheesy but surprisingly quite entertaining.
Most importantly though, I had a rare evening out with my wife and she had a good time.

I drove my eldest to the coach stop during the recent cold snap. Snow was coming down but not too badly.
Halfway there though, it suddenly turned into a blizzard.
My daughter called a friend on the coach to check if it was still coming, and as it was and nearly there, we waited for it.
Getting home was like driving on an ice rink. As I turned off the main road, the car refused, insisting on going off at a tangent.
I steered into it like you're supposed to and braked, released, and braked again, but I still elegantly slid into a brick wall.
Bugger!
Gingerly reversing back, I traveled the rest of the way in Low gear at 1mph.
The next morning I checked for damage but fortunately it was all superficial.

My local cinema does a ‘Kid’s club’ during weekends and holidays.
Children's tickets cost just £2.50 and adults go free. (As long as there is one child per adult.)
This is brilliant as taking the family to the movies usually costs me over £50 including drinks and popcorn.
The film choice is limited to one film per week, but they are usually good fun.
I wasn’t particularly looking forward to ‘Hotel for Dogs’ but it was surprisingly OK and uplifting, despite being completely unbelievable.

My parents came around for a visit last Sunday. They walked the dog with my youngest two children and me.
The day was lovely and we walked for hours in the fields and forest behind my house.
When we got to some open land we played ‘Postman’s knock’ and ‘Stuck-in-the-mud’.
Never play ‘Stuck-in-the-mud’ on wet grass.
The children barely stayed on their feet. I went down a couple of times, as did my Mum and Dad.
I’m embarrassed to say that I tagged my Mum while she was flat on her back.
It was the only way I would have been able to catch her!

I just got a text from my wife requesting I buy ‘Milk chocolate cat food’ on the way home.
Seems like an odd flavour to me.

I have three children, but unfortunately one of them doesn’t like chocolate.
This makes Easter very unfair.
She didn’t make a fuss, but I must think of something better than just chocolate eggs next year.
Oddly she was the one who came to the Easter Mass with me. She really enjoyed the candle holding and especially the overly enthusiastic holy water flicking.
I even knew most of the hymns!

I took all three of my children to see my Mum on Mothering Sunday.
While sitting with my Dad, he asked ‘So where are the flowers then?’.
I didn’t realise he was being sarcastic until I was driving home.

(Just for the record, my Mum got a card and three bunches of flowers. One from each grandchild. My Dad just hadn't seen them yet.)